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**Tom Holland Becomes Highest-Grossing Lead Actor of All Time**

In an extraordinary accomplishment over the weekend, Tom Holland is said to have emerged as the highest-grossing lead actor in history. This achievement stems from two significant box office hits: *Spider-Man: Brand New Day* and *The Odyssey*.

As per a report by [BBN Times](https://www.bbntimes.com/society/tom-holland-tops-all-time-highest-grossing-actor-list-making-history-at-30), corroborated by weekend box-office statistics from [The Numbers](https://www.the-numbers.com/weekend-box-office-chart), both films contributed roughly $15 million to their overall revenue in the United States over the weekend. Currently, *The Odyssey* has amassed an impressive $1,684,432,000 globally, while *Spider-Man: Brand New Day* has reached a remarkable $2,451,171,000, not including international ticket sales from the weekend.

With these numbers, Holland surpasses Zoe Saldaña—star of *Avatar* and fellow Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU) actor—whose estimated worldwide box-office gross is around $15.47 billion. Holland has now eclipsed the $15.5 billion threshold.

It is crucial to note that this accomplishment relies on unadjusted box office gains, meaning inflation is not considered. The top-grossing lead actor status when adjusted for inflation remains a contentious subject, with some sources proposing it could be Harrison Ford, although this is unclear due to limited inquiries.

Furthermore, Holland’s position as the highest-grossing leading actor does not apply to overall standings when including non-lead roles. In that wider perspective, performers like Samuel L. Jackson or Stan Lee dominate the list, primarily due to their prolific contributions to the MCU.

Additionally, Robert Downey Jr. is close behind Holland, with his lead roles generating approximately $14.3 billion worldwide. With Holland gearing up to miss *Avengers: Doomsday*, a film anticipated to yield considerable revenue, it remains to be seen how long he will maintain his title as the highest-grossing lead actor.

In summary, Tom Holland’s rise to the pinnacle of box office charts underscores not only the tremendous success of his latest films but also the significant appeal of the MCU. The interplay between lead and non-lead roles, inflation-adjusted earnings, and the upcoming releases in the superhero genre continue to spur discussions regarding profits and standing within Hollywood’s elite.

### Marvel’s Wolverine: A Look at Liam McIntyre’s Promise as the Next Logan

With the eagerly awaited video game **Marvel’s Wolverine** debuting on PS5, gamers and enthusiasts are diving into conversations about its initial reception—characterized by mixed feedback and a variety of meme-worthy moments circulating online. Among the critiques, one clear standout has emerged: Liam McIntyre’s representation of the iconic character Logan. His performance has rekindled debates about who should inherit the role of Wolverine in the Marvel Cinematic Universe (MCU).

#### The Legacy of Hugh Jackman

Hugh Jackman has famously portrayed Wolverine for more than twenty years since his introduction in the 2000 film **X-Men**. Celebrated for his layered interpretation of the rugged, adamantium-clawed mutant, Jackman’s engagement in various manifestations of the franchise—including prequels and alternate timelines—has made him synonymous with the character. His departure from the role in 2017’s **Logan** appeared to be final, yet the actor returned for a cameo in **Deadpool 3**, prompting fans to ponder his future in the MCU, especially with the anticipated emergence of multiverse-themed narratives.

#### The New Era of X-Men

As Marvel refreshes its cinematic universe to launch a new generation of **X-Men** films, considerable excitement has developed around the new cast. With talents like Sadie Sink as Jean Grey and Kit Connor as Cyclops assuming iconic positions, the lack of a clearly defined successor for Wolverine remains a notable void. McIntyre’s engaging performance as Logan in the video game acts as a strong audition, indicating he could be a promising contender for this crucial role.

#### McIntyre’s Unique Interpretation

In **Marvel’s Wolverine**, McIntyre delivers a unique take on Logan, harmonizing the character’s tortured soul with a warmth that distinguishes his portrayal from Jackman’s well-known version. While there are some discrepancies in the game’s representation of his likeness, his vocal performance and emotional depth effectively convey the intricacies of Logan.

Critics have highlighted that McIntyre’s performance stands apart from Jackman’s legacy while preserving the essential traits that define Wolverine. He captures the character’s conflicts and weaknesses without resorting to imitation, providing audiences with a new viewpoint on the legendary mutant.

#### Challenges Ahead

Despite McIntyre’s impressive performance, the game itself has encountered criticisms for its ambitious narrative that strives to interlace multiple Wolverine and X-Men storylines. This intricacy may confuse those who aren’t well-acquainted with the comic lore, possibly influencing how audiences view both the game and McIntyre’s contribution within it.

By accepting the challenge of stepping into a role made legendary by Jackman, McIntyre invites immediate comparisons. Nonetheless, his representation in this video game gives Marvel a substantial portfolio to reflect on when casting the next Wolverine, showcasing his abilities in a 15-hour gaming adventure.

#### Conclusion

As Marvel sets out to create a new **X-Men** narrative, Liam McIntyre’s performance in **Marvel’s Wolverine** positions him not solely as a voice actor for a video game but as a prospective successor to one of the most cherished characters in comic book lore. While fans look forward to the forthcoming film adaptation, McIntyre emerges as a formidable candidate to inherit the essence of Logan, demonstrating that fresh interpretations of iconic characters can resonate profoundly with both long-standing fans and newcomers alike. As conversations about the future of Wolverine persist, it is evident that the legacy of this character will evolve, much like the universe around him.

**Rayman Legends Reimagined: A Postponed Remake with Elevated Anticipation**

*Rayman Legends Reimagined* is poised to be a crucial release for Ubisoft in the autumn of 2026, representing the firm’s only new game debut aside from *Just Dance: Decades of Hits*. Initially slated for an October 1 debut, the remake of the beloved 2013 platformer has been delayed to December 3, despite Ubisoft’s assertions that the game was complete.

The development team rationalized the postponement by declaring, “Although the game has officially been completed, we have opted to take additional time to ensure that every aspect receives the attention it warrants.” They conveyed excitement for the forthcoming promotion, featuring a Game Overview trailer set to debut on September 22, where creators and media will share their perspectives on the game.

*Rayman Legends Reimagined* reinterprets the original title with enhanced 3D graphics powered by Ubisoft’s Snowdrop engine, retaining much of the beloved gameplay and design features from the original classic. Initial responses from a limited hands-on preview suggested favorable feedback, making the last-minute postponement somewhat surprising.

Ubisoft is under considerable scrutiny due to this delay, coinciding with a broader trend of release deferrals for the company. Previously, titles like *Assassin’s Creed Shadows* and installments in the *Far Cry* and *Ghost Recon* series have endured similar outcomes, often linked to the necessity for further refinement. These delays have led to financial difficulties for Ubisoft, prompting the company to explore external funding and undertake restructuring, which regrettably has resulted in layoffs and studio closures.

With *Rayman Legends Reimagined*, fans are anxious to witness how the remake will fuse nostalgia with contemporary gaming technology, while Ubisoft endeavors to deliver a refined and polished product that meets the elevated expectations set by its predecessor. The landscape for the publisher this fall appears rather limited, concentrating attention squarely on this remake as a potential turning point in a trying time for the company.

### Grasping the Post-Credits Scenes of Marvel’s Wolverine and Their Consequences for the Future

**Introduction**

Insomniac’s *Marvel’s Wolverine* weaves traditional X-Men mythology with new plotlines, leaving numerous narrative threads available for possible sequels. The game presents two post-credits scenes, which act as portals to more profound story arcs and future developments within the Marvel cosmos. This article will examine these scenes, their characters, and the ramifications for upcoming tales.

**The First Post-Credits Scene**

The initial scene is open to all players and presents a key character, Sabretooth. In this moment, Sabretooth encounters an unblemished Helix Engine, a tool previously used in the game to revive dormant mutants. This event holds weight as it suggests Sabretooth’s connection with Apocalypse, whose voice has lingered ominously throughout the game.

Apocalypse, or En Sabah Nur, ranks among the most powerful antagonists in the Marvel universe. Originating in Egypt millennia ago, he is one of the first mutants, recognized for his capacity to manipulate his molecular structure and display superhuman strength, alongside impressive psychic powers.

Within the game’s framework, Apocalypse’s impact hints at the rise of a new danger. Conventionally, Apocalypse is associated with his “four horsemen,” each symbolizing devastating natural forces: Famine, Death, War, and Pestilence. While Sabretooth seemingly assumes the role of one horseman, the identities of the other three remain ambiguous, providing Insomniac the chance to introduce various Marvel characters into prospective future narratives.

Logan, recognized as Wolverine, shares a tumultuous past with Apocalypse and once held the title of Horseman of Death. Throughout *Wolverine*, he confronts lost recollections, including his link to Apocalypse, complicating his personal journey within the story.

**The Second Post-Credits Scene**

The second post-credits scene deepens Logan’s character and necessitates players to conquer specific challenges to access it. This scene transports players 75 years before the main narrative, where a flashback unveils Logan’s connection with Jean Grey.

In this touching moment, Jean reminisces about their first encounter and her attempts to purify his mind of the Death identity imposed by Apocalypse. Her ability to surpass death herself and the enduring bond between her and Logan emphasize themes of connection, loss, and redemption that permeate the game. The scene culminates in a tranquil instance in their cabin, capturing a rare period of joy amid their otherwise chaotic lives.

**Logan’s Path Ahead**

The narrative concludes with Logan’s memories largely erased, steering him towards a path of self-exploration. This open-ended finish places Logan in a position for further exploration in future installments, contingent on Insomniac’s decision to extend the saga.

**Conclusion**

*Marvel’s Wolverine* adeptly employs its post-credits scenes to pave the way for a deeper examination of character lore and interpersonal dynamics that have long been integral to the X-Men narrative. With a foundation set for future conflicts and character revelations, fans remain enthusiastic for what awaits in this captivating universe crafted by Insomniac. As the saga progresses, the intertwined destinies of Wolverine, Jean Grey, and their companions are sure to yield rich storytelling and exhilarating developments in potential sequels.

**Valve’s Steam Frame: An In-Depth Look at the Newest VR Headset**

Valve, a well-regarded entity in the realm of gaming hardware and software, has unveiled its latest creation, the Steam Frame, a standalone virtual reality headset. Serving as the successor to the Valve Index, the Steam Frame comes with a considerable price tag, featuring a 256GB version priced at $1,060 and a 1TB option at $1,300. In addition to these variants, Valve provides an Ergonomics Kit for an extra $60, aimed at improving user comfort with controller straps and head support.

### **Design and Construction Quality**

At first glance, the Steam Frame sports a rather simplistic design. It resembles a pair of sturdy plastic goggles held by fabric straps and a rubber battery compartment. While its lightweight build enhances comfort during prolonged use, the initial tactile sensation raises concerns regarding its robustness. The shiny surface readily displays fingerprints, and the incorporation of magnets in the faceplate connection imparts a sense of delicacy, as creaks and cracks are noted with routine handling.

Nonetheless, once donned, the comfort level is commendable, as the headset feels light and delivers crisp visuals. Users have shared favorable impressions of navigating menus and experiencing clear text— a vital element for an enjoyable VR setting.

### **Controller Performance**

The Steam Frame includes new controllers that bear a resemblance to those of rivals such as the Quest series. Despite their functionality, users voice dissatisfaction over the choice to not enhance the praised design of the Valve Index controllers. The new controllers, which initially come across as basic wands devoid of extra straps, may not align with the expectations of experienced VR enthusiasts seeking a more sophisticated grip and button arrangement. Although the straps do boost usability to a degree, they still do not reach the comfort and innovation levels of the earlier model.

### **Interface and User Experience**

The interface of the Steam Frame is akin to that of the Steam Deck, facilitating a smooth transition for those acquainted with Valve’s ecosystem. A standout feature is the capability to access Steam directly from the headset without requiring a PC, enabling users to install and play VR games natively. However, some users have faced connectivity challenges, necessitating numerous attempts to gain a stable Wi-Fi connection, which can be aggravating.

Gaming performance, while remarkable in certain aspects—especially with Valve’s own title *Half-Life: Alyx*, which employs advanced rendering techniques—has been inconsistent. Numerous players have encountered visual downgrades and performance setbacks in demanding games, prompting concerns regarding the headset’s ability to deliver a stable gaming experience.

### **Battery Performance and Streaming Abilities**

Battery life tends to be a significant issue, with users reporting gameplay durations of only 60 to 90 minutes per charge, particularly with graphically lean titles. Nevertheless, Valve’s groundbreaking streaming technology excels, enabling users to play high-quality VR games installed on their PCs without perceivable lag. This feature greatly enhances the gaming experience, extending playtime and decreasing dependence on the headset’s built-in capabilities.

### **Intended Audience and Market Positioning**

As the VR realm progresses, the pricing and features of the Steam Frame prompt inquiries regarding its intended audience. Novices to VR might hesitate to put down over $1,000 for the Steam Frame, particularly when budget-friendly alternatives like the Meta Quest 3 provide adequate experiences at a much lower price. For current VR gamers, the Steam Frame may not offer a compelling upgrade, especially if they already own solid systems within the Meta ecosystem or similar high-end configurations.

### **Final Thoughts**

In a period when VR gaming seems a bit stagnant, the introduction of the Steam Frame may seem poorly timed. Despite its potential and innovative features, many users find themselves questioning its overall value in comparison to more established competitors in the market. Whether it can secure a niche in the current VR landscape remains to be determined, as the community evaluates its performance and capabilities against the hefty price tag. For now, the Steam Frame emerges as an intriguing addition to Valve’s hardware range, one that may need further enhancements to fulfill the lofty expectations set by its predecessors.

### Bungie Unveils Significant Revisions to Marathon with Season 3 Update

Recently, Bungie disclosed major modifications to the seasonal framework for their extraction shooter, *Marathon*. The much-anticipated Season 3 update has not only experienced a delay, but the entire seasonal architecture is being eliminated. This declaration coincides with a preview of the game’s first substantial content release post-seasonal model, which brings large alien insects into the game’s realm.

#### The Symbiosis Update

Scheduled for release on December 8, the update named “Symbiosis” signifies the first considerable progression in *Marathon*’s development. According to Bungie, this update will unveil the game’s first permanent PvE mode, allowing players to interact with the environment in novel ways that extend beyond the conventional PvPvE extraction gameplay. Bungie refers to “Symbiosis” as a crucial milestone in the game’s progress, marking the start of a wider transformation influenced by player feedback as they advance into the future.

#### New Creatures and Gameplay

The announcement was accompanied by visuals showing *Marathon* Runners confronting a colossal insect-like creature, reminiscent of foes from other shooters like *Helldivers 2*. This signifies a considerable shift, as players have only met smaller beings on Tau Ceti IV, but never at such an impressive scale. Bungie suggested that they will offer players more in-depth details about what they can look forward to from these new alien entities and their integration into the game’s mechanics.

#### Future Plans and Community Feedback

In their communications, Bungie guaranteed the community that further detailed updates concerning *Marathon*’s future would be shared, including a specific blog focusing on the game’s shift towards a more alien and dynamic survival environment. The developers acknowledged the presence of mixed opinions in the community, with some players wishing for more PvP content and others leaning towards a shift towards PvE features.

The previous season encountered criticism when expected survival horror elements did not manifest as promised, leaving a number of players disheartened. The forthcoming Symbiosis update brings hope for meeting players’ aspirations for an experience that includes AI-driven NPCs and environmental obstacles.

#### The Road Ahead

With *Destiny 2* having now moved away from continual updates, *Marathon* holds the potential to grow into a game that addresses this void. Players are keen to discover if Bungie will bring back the Pfhor or other long-established elements from the game’s lore. As the community remains engaged with any upcoming iterations of *Marathon*, expectations are high for what lies ahead in this exciting shooter’s journey.

As December draws near, anticipation for the Symbiosis update intensifies, promising a new and vibrant expansion to the *Marathon* experience that many players have grown to cherish.

### The Current State of Crossovers in Video Gaming: An Examination of Fortnite’s Overabundant Collaborations

In today’s landscape of video gaming, crossovers have gained significant traction, impacting not only game development but also community ideals and player enjoyment. Epic Games’ widely popular battle royale title, Fortnite, stands out as a prime illustration of this corporate merging, with characters and themes from diverse franchises saturating its virtual realm. Nevertheless, this phenomenon has elicited mixed feedback from players, with many voicing their discontent regarding the excessive number of collaborations, which often appear forced or unauthentic.

#### The KPop Demon Hunters Collaboration: A Pivotal Moment

Recently, the KPop Demon Hunters collaboration merged pop culture with gaming visuals, enchanting some fans while leaving others feeling disenfranchised. A player’s experience exemplifies a prevalent feeling, recounting how the event altered their perspective on the game. After only a week of involvement, they expressed their choice to cease playing due to a profound sense of disconnection from the fundamental gaming experience. This discontent was widespread; numerous players echoed concerns about the oversaturation of crossovers that detract from gameplay and immersion.

#### The Kingdom Hearts Crossover: A New Level of Discomfort

As if the KPop collaboration wasn’t sufficient, Fortnite is now integrating characters from the cherished Kingdom Hearts series. While excitement about Sora’s arrival should be high, the response is somewhat subdued due to the depiction of these legendary characters. Observers have noted that they appear “off,” with critics remarking that Sora’s expression lacks the warmth and charisma that fans hold dear. Evaluating the character’s design, the vacant expression has drawn parallels to previous skin releases, prompting inquiries about the artistic sincerity of these character transformations.

#### The Influence of Character Design on Player Perception

Character design, particularly in games where visuals are crucial, significantly influences how players perceive and engage with the game. The uncanny valley effect, where characters appear almost human yet disturbingly similar, can induce discomfort. The reaction to characters like Sora highlights a broader issue of player emotional attachment to cherished franchises, which may feel compromised in a game where their likeness is repurposed for commercial interests.

Moreover, the continuous addition of more characters from Kingdom Hearts as part of the ongoing “Gaming Legends season” raises persistent questions about the intentions behind such collaborations. Are these efforts aimed at enhancing gameplay, or are they simply tactics to garner attention and profit through nostalgia?

#### The Future of Crossovers in Fortnite

As Fortnite persistently broadens its array of collaborations, players are left to contemplate the longevity of this trend. Will the ceaseless influx of recognizable characters from various media retain its charm, or will it ultimately result in player exhaustion? The challenge for developers resides in balancing the excitement of fresh content with preserving the essence of the original game experience.

In summary, while crossovers in gaming can foster unique avenues for creativity and community participation, they can also result in dissatisfaction when executed without regard for players’ emotional connections to the material. As Epic Games navigates this terrain, players will remain vigilant, hoping for a return to the foundational elements that initially made Fortnite appealing. The discussion surrounding these collaborations continues, reflecting a broader concern within the gaming community regarding the balance between innovation and commercialization.

### Blizzcon 2026 Highlights: World of Warcraft: Forever

Blizzcon 2026 unveiled an exciting announcement: *World of Warcraft: Forever*. This new installment is designed for players yearning for the nostalgic feel of *Classic WoW* while delivering a novel approach to content without rehashing previous dungeons and raids.

Lead Classic designer Tim Jones and lead encounter designer Mike Nuthals offered essential insights into the forthcoming game, scheduled to debut on November 4. Below are eight significant points discussed during their presentation.

#### No Unconventional Class Combinations at Launch

In contrast to the *Season of Discovery*, which permitted unorthodox class roles like Shaman Tanks, *Forever* will adhere to conventional class specifications at launch. Jones stressed the intention to prioritize simplicity and clear identities among classes, avoiding the disorder witnessed in past iterations. While the team remains receptive to input regarding distinctive roles, players should not anticipate the same degree of flexibility initially.

#### Varied Raid Options

Considering feedback on inflexible raid sizes, each raid tier in *Forever* will present at least one 10-player option and one 20-player option. This adjustment accommodates different group sizes, ensuring that smaller teams can tackle challenging content without being compelled to join larger groups. Jones assured that 10-player raids will consistently offer a legitimate challenge and rewards.

#### Higher Mount Training Costs

To reflect player investment, *Forever* will impose increased gold costs associated with mount training. Although details on monetization strategies were not revealed, Jones underscored the necessity for players to exert effort to earn rewards, enhancing the sense of accomplishment when obtaining mounts.

#### Warlock Summoning Features

Players will still require a Warlock in their group to summon party members to dungeons and raids, as Meeting Stones will not provide this capability. Instead, they will support a new Looking for Group feature. The team believes that some downtime before significant activities promotes social interactions, allowing players to engage before facing challenges.

#### Add-on Limitations

While details regarding add-on functionalities in *Forever* remain unclear, Nuthals suggested alignment with retail conventions, limiting in-game or in-combat calculators. The aim is to sustain a balanced experience without permitting automation to reduce player involvement.

#### Depth in Combat Mechanics

Players should not anticipate a simplistic one-button rotation in *Forever*. The design aims to uphold a level of complexity, ensuring gameplay remains engaging without being overly simplified.

#### Innovative PvP Progression System

Battlegrounds will feature a new progression system where players gain honor to rise through ranks. This framework promises various rewards, including PvP gear and cosmetic items, while also introducing new battlegrounds such as the Darkspear Islands.

#### A Promise of Longevity

The title “Forever” signifies a commitment to providing ongoing content and a consistent gaming setting. Jones communicated that players can invest their time in characters with the assurance that their efforts will produce enduring outcomes. This approach shifts away from seasonal limitations, emphasizing horizontal progression and the introduction of content that accommodates diverse playstyles.

*World of Warcraft: Forever* aspires to offer a distinctive mix of nostalgic gameplay combined with new experiences, ensuring a community-driven and player-centered environment for many years ahead.

### The Future of Immersive Sims: Thoughts from Veteran Designer Randy Smith Evergreen

In the continually changing realm of the gaming sector, veteran game creator Randy Smith Evergreen, recognized for his notable input in the *Thief* series, emphasizes the significance of prioritizing high-caliber content and gameplay over massive production budgets. His perspectives, particularly pertinent for indie developers and creators of immersive simulation games, highlight a transition from an emphasis on hyper-realistic visuals to significant gameplay experiences, particularly as the industry looks toward 2026.

#### A Change in Budgeting for Quality

In a recent discussion with *PC Gamer*, Smith Evergreen noted the stark difference between the budget of the initial *Thief* title, which was about $3 million, and the bloated budgets of contemporary AAA games, which can exceed $250 million. He proposes that creating a modern immersive sim in 2026 should ideally keep a budget between $3 to $10 million. He asserts that a larger budget does not inherently link to greater sales or success, particularly in a niche genre like immersive sims, which caters to a specific segment of the gaming audience.

Smith underlines that the perceived necessity for larger budgets often arises from the industry’s fixation on cutting-edge graphics. Nevertheless, he contends that the winning components of a game lie more in quality content and gameplay mechanics than in graphical excellence. “It’s not apparent to me that the $3-million *Thief* or *Deus Ex* style immersive sim that you aim to create in the year 2026 is going to sell disproportionately different quantities of copies than the $250-million one that emerges from a major studio,” he stated.

#### The Importance of Visual Fidelity

Smith Evergreen maintains that a game’s visuals need to achieve only a reasonable level of fidelity to successfully engage players. Referencing *Alan Wake*, he noted that although the game was fairly photorealistic, the question persists whether enhanced graphical detail significantly enhances the gaming experience. “As long as the game’s visuals set the atmosphere and clearly convey what the player needs to know, that’s sufficient,” he observed.

He acknowledges that although players may lean toward visually appealing games with intricate graphics, such features are not imperative for an immersive experience. Games that demonstrate strong gameplay combined with creativity have consistently connected with audiences, a pattern visible in numerous cherished indie titles developed over the last thirty years.

#### The Future for Indie Developers

Smith Evergreen champions a new path in the gaming industry, especially within the indie sector. He advocates for game developers to strive for high-quality content while eschewing excessive expenditures on production. “That’s the direction I think a lot of things need to take right now,” he expressed, reinforcing the idea that creativity and gameplay should come before extravagant graphical displays.

This viewpoint aligns with the rising trend of indie games that emphasize innovative gameplay mechanics and storytelling over excessive production values. Titles like *FTL* serve as prominent examples of games that have found success with relatively modest budgets, demonstrating that creativity frequently outshines high expenses.

#### Conclusion

Randy Smith Evergreen’s insights act as a vital reminder to game makers about the fundamental elements that lead to successful gaming experiences. As the industry evolves and technology progresses, the focus should revert to crafting engaging, high-quality gameplay that captivates players, rather than yielding to the demands of producing visually stunning but financially taxing titles. As indie developers navigate this terrain, Smith’s suggestions could shape the future of immersive simulation games and the larger gaming community. For additional insights on his perspectives regarding the industry and forthcoming projects, readers can check out *PC Gamer’s* complete interview.

Happy new week all! Over the weekend I banished all thought of rocks, paper or shotguns and volunteered to pick apples at a local orchard. Many wonderful varieties were carefully netted, then jumbled together in a huge mesh bag: speckled golden sours, fit to devour immediately with an appreciative grimace; jolly green cookers, wearing their scabs like medals of honour; sharp little reds that slice up into the clearest white wedges. Such intoxicating fruit! As we blundered around with poles and hard hats, we trampled on dozens of fallen, rotting apples, spicing the air with a sickly pungence.

It was then that I saw it: the juiciest apple of all, dangling almost within grabbing distance in a peculiar depth of shade, beneath a tree of somehow abyssal provenance – its leaves salt-rimed and its roots akin to sunken steel anchors. I reached and the apple danced back a metre, becoming luminous. By its light, I perceived the slow parting of enormous crystal fangs. Damn it, Maw! I am trying to pick apples in peace. It’s just as well I’ve brought a second mesh bag of new PC games to feed you.

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